So they opt for the safest option: Encourage his masculinity in other areas, like health and career. Overcoming fear of rejection is the most frequent conversation I have in the coaching I do. They can apply to either spouse in a marriage, but since you asked the question, I am using the woman as the example of the person withholding sex. Adolescents have a number of developmental tasks to perform before entering a psychologically healthy young adulthood. If you and your wife want your marriage to survive, you will need to talk about what is going on with her. You need to first evaluate the situation for yourself, then try to communicate with your wife, and finally come up with a resolution that is acceptable to both of you. They must give up… the feeling that all options are open to them; they can no longer hold the fantasy that they can grow up to be whatever they want.
He has been conditioned to worship and seek the approval of women remember all the female teachers etc.? Why should he stand down with dignity, rather than foolishly fight a battle that does not exist? James Barclay Mature men who appreciate the female form have their particular preferences of her anatomy and women know their assets not a pun. If you have emotionally drifted apart from each other, then you both need to do serious work to bridge the gap between you. This does not line up with reality. Lack of intimacy in a marriage usually leads to a troubled marriage, and in many cases can be the cause of divorce. Your wife wants to be taken care of, but wants to be recognized as your equal. Are you willing to live with the prospect of little to no intimacy for the rest of your life? This is great to do when dating. Even when we were intimate, it was far and few between. If so, then you need to find out if this is a one-way relationship as it does not look like your wife is reciprocating this love. Treatment will make a world of difference. If this is even remotely true in your case, then I highly recommend you get personal therapy and find out why you allow yourself to be emotionally and physically neglected by your spouse. Is she on any medications? They will not attempt any sexual move that puts them at risk of rejection. Are you able to handle being corrected on that which you have incorrectly asserted? Ideally, you and your wife are both invested in this marriage and will want to work it out. If so, think about what you are modeling for them as far as what kind of mate to look for when they are older. Does she have a lot of ups and downs? Ultimately, it may be that your wife is not invested in this marriage and is not willing to do her part to maintain a healthy relationship. Her value system is against sex. These are not in any particular order, they are just reasons I have run into in my practice. What is it about you that made you put up with not getting intimacy for three years? Except for rare medical cases when a person is physically unable to have sex, in my opinion it is never alright for a spouse to permanently withhold intimacy from his or her partner. Ask him who he thinks should lead and initiate.
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What should I do if my wife no longer wants to have sex
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