We understand how important, and sometimes confusing, it can be to protect a child. When I asked my friend about this, she said that "she is an American now. My older daughter described sexual sounds from him and his girlfriend. When a child witnesses or overhears a sexual encounter between adults, it could be accidentally or with intent. Don't cut her off at the knees with this relationship if your ultimate goal is for her to be happy and stable.. When the girl first came over, she only spoke Russian, but she is learning English quickly. Sign up below to get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week. Also, for the record, what's your opinion? Safety Planning Although it sounds like this may have been an awkward experience, this could be a great chance to talk about this real life situation to both of your daughters in an Age-Appropriate manner.
It doesn't matter if you're responding to what she said, or having an intense conversation with someone else that doesn't include her—she will loudly interrupt and talk over you, and it may or may not be related. Is this just inappropriate or is it abuse? Imagine being in the middle of a story and—Oh my, did I tell you what Judy did at the office today? Speaking Up Talking to your ex-husband, despite your daughter not wanting you to, would be a good next step. That can make a significant difference. I haven't told my wife because she would freak, but I have talked to my daughter. When you speak to your daughter's father, let him know what your daughter told you and that it made her uncomfortable. Teaching your daughters the difference between secrets and surprises may be helpful as well. When I attempted, I was at a residential treatment facility. Any advice would be much appreciated. I know that some families see nothing wrong with this, but my feeling is that at 8, he's too old to kiss adult women on the lips. Your mother-in-law probably won't even notice if you interrupt her back, like Prudie suggested, and will be very comfortable with you insisting on finishing your thought. Next I heard my daughter and her boyfriend having sex? It even happens in the middle of weekdays when I'm trying to get work done, and has proved to be quite the distraction. Discuss this column with Dear Prudence on her Facebook page! Is there a polite way to broach this subject, or do we just have to suck it up? Life is such a rich, rich tapestry. Discussing healthy sexuality and development, as well as your values and rules about touching, privacy, and appropriate boundaries are the two keys to a family Safety Plan. It's affected my ability to move on and trust any type of relationship. I figured they'd be smart and respectful and responsible if I allowed them to share a bed. Another tactic is bringing up how helpful being bilingual is when applying for jobs or college. The bottom line is that your ex-husband should be aware that his daughter heard him and was uncomfortable, and that this should not happen again. You will of course respect her privacy but when safety is a concern, adults do need to make decisions about who to talk to. Accidentally, walls may be thin and a child may be able to hear something from another room, or perhaps they unintentionally walked into the bedroom during a sexual act. And if I do, what should I say?
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